Crack filled crack

[jedi_of_urth]

Blame goldy_dollar it's all her fault. That this is probably full of errors is my own but we're going to pretend it's the Master's own fault. Anyway, seeing as the Master totally ships Doctor/Rose (and really just loves Rose), here's to thinking he also writes fanfic. I'm sorry, so very sorry.



The Master’s Secret Fiction Concepts
(No Lucy I will not call it fanfic)


-Lucy and I have dinner with the Doctor and Rose
Pros: Not out of character for the Doctor to ask me out on a date, chance to show that I am always smarter than him. Could take place in *my* TARDIS so I could rub that in his face too.
Cons: I believe it is not in character for Rose to call me Master, but that is my name.

-Lucy and Rose shove Martha Jones off a cliff
Pros: Shoving Martha off a cliff, probably many cliffs wherever she is. Possible girl on girl action after shoving is complete. Idea of Lucy shoving someone off cliff is hot (should use in real life).
Cons: By rights, Lucy should also shove Rose off a cliff as she is more dangerous than Martha, this would negate desired girl on girl action in this story. Also would have to justify Rose’s presence.

-Journal of Doctor’s emo since loss of Rose
Pros: Chance to mock Doctor for nearly crying whenever I ask about Rose for characterization purposes.
Cons: He’d probably accuse me of finding his actual diary of emo since loss of Rose. Would have to find good thesaurus entry for “sad.”

-Alternate reality story where I met Rose first
Pros: Wish Rose had been my companion (Lucy is great, but she couldn’t absorb the Time Vortex). Alternate reality Doctor would never have known her and would be even more pathetic now. Words “alternate reality’ and “Rose” when used together annoy Doctor.
Cons: Could make me envious of my own alternate reality.

-After destroying this world, cross to other universe and make Rose like Lucy for that universe
Pros: Easy to invent fictional reason why I could cross universes. Quite like fantasy of turning the Doctor’s love into my own, and I get second hot blond wife, and second universe to control. Would include scene where the Doctor dies of broken heart (could even force him to watch us have sex in story).
Cons: Again, am somewhat envious of my own invented future. Also, Doctor dying of broken heart is most in character but would prevent him from seeing rest of what happens in the story.

-Doctor/Rose reunion story
Pros: Good for taunting Doctor with as will never happen. Probable cuteness of story good for days when just ruling the world; having hot wife; having Doctor as pet, Jack to torture/kill, and Jones family to torment is not enough to make me smile.
Cons: Am somehow sad that it will never happen even if probable cute levels should be called sickening. Might give Doctor ideas about crossing universes.

-Doctor/Rose/Jack sex story
Pros: Have promised to Jack in exchange for his help on editing and characterization. He says the group of them never did have sex, but I know he wanted to, so can also bother him with ideas that never happened.
Cons: Breaking promises to Jack is also fun (and he was not complimentary of my me/Rose stories). Would feel urge to de-age Doctor and retrieve Rose in order to confirm hotness of sex scene.

Comments

[surrender-drthy.livejournal.com]

lol! that's brilliant :D very very amusing, and very Master-y.. at least from what I know of him.