Writing related things
Apr. 5th, 2011 09:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jedi_of_urth1) Where the hell have my muses gone? I've got big bangs and LAS fics to write and my muses are no where to be found. COME BACK MUSES.
2) I encourage people to go and vote in the various las challenges, I have a vested interest in hoping you vote for me in the![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
fanvideo_las voting that's currently going on.
3) And now to catch up on posting recent LAS ics I wrote.
Name: jedi_of_urth
Shows: Frasier
Story Title: Thinking About You
Character/Relationships: Niles Crane Niles/Daphne
Rating: PG
Warnings: none
“When I was with Maris, or with Mel, I found myself thinking about you. Going about my day or even when I was in a session, I found myself thinking about you. Well, now we're together. I find myself thinking about you. It's not going to stop.” ~Niles Crane, ‘The First Temptation of Daphne
He couldn’t help it if his mind wandered during the day. Waiting in the Café for Frasier or as he finished up his notes from a session he could afford to let him mind drift and for years now his errant thoughts had always lead him back to Daphne.
At first it had been a guilty fantasy, something he could only indulge in in the parts of his mind that Maris wouldn’t weasel in to. Even his thoughts of Daphne had to be kept away from thoughts of Maris because the two things simply could not coexist. When Daphne was in the room Maris did not exist, and when Daphne was on his mind Maris was nowhere to be found.
Then it had become a refuge from the pressures of the real world. As the life he had built crumbled around him he would retreat into dreams of what he could barely hope would one day be. She’d made it clear many times that a man even tethered to a marriage was not a man she was interested in; though she only spoke in the hypothetical, not to whether between the two of them specifically it might have worked. But he had enough fodder for an active fantasy of what it might be like to be with her, to dream of what might be.
Later it was more of a nightmare than a dream. The pain of reality encroached on his day- dreams as she prepared to marry someone else. Even as he involved himself with Mel, his heart still thought only of Daphne. He tried not to think of her as he had for so long, tried to frame it in only the context of friendship, wondering how her day was going or what interesting things she might have to say the next time he was at Frasier’s. He tried not to wonder if she was feeling nervous about the wedding or still had doubts.
Now his wandering thoughts bring a smile to his face. As always his dreams find her, but now he thinks about whether they need bird food or what they should serve the next time dad and Frasier come over for dinner. The wondrous concerns of everyday life that he enjoyed by the side of the woman he loved with all his heart.
And if sometimes his thoughts drift to more intimate topics and he can’t suppress the giddy smile that spreads across his face he wears in proudly. After all, he’s living proof that dreams can become reality.
Name: jedi_of_urth
Shows: Legend of the Seeker
Story Title: Love Across Time
Character/Relationships: Richard, Cara, Richard/Kahlan
Rating: PG
Warnings: Spoilers from the end of season 1
“Have you thought of any plan for what we do if this doesn’t work?” Cara asked as they climbed up another rocky hill on their way back to where Richard had stored the Boxes of Ordin.
Even Richard’s usual good humor didn’t let him be happy that Cara had started to refer to the pair of them as we, at least for the duration of this trip. He knew, and he knew Cara knew, that there was no back up to this plan. If it didn’t work he’d either be dead or Confessed and either way he wasn’t going to be carrying out any more plots against the Master, Nicholas Rahl.
He’d fight a dozen Darken Rahls if it meant this future never existed. A timeline in which Kahlan was dead, but only after she had already sacrificed everything in the hope that Richard could make things right. He’d be damned if he let her down after that.
That thought kept him going on days when by all logic he should give up. He would not let Kahlan down; he would never let Kahlan down.
“It’ll work out,” he assured Cara in a voice ragged from hunger and exhaustion. Cara would think he was being excessively optimistic, but she didn’t hear him mutter to himself, “It has to.”
Name: jedi_of_urth
Story Title: Borrow the Moment
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: JE spoilers, plus hints of the Doctor’s state of mind during the specials.
The Dementor Trap was among the foulest things anyone had every thought of that didn’t kill someone. Although, in truth, anyone left too long in the Trap would expire eventually; and if a person had seen or done too many things they regretted, the horror of those memories coming back to them at full force could kill quickly.
The Doctor’s mind was made of sterner stuff that most people in the universe, so when he wandered into the Trap he sensed what had happened and had a split second to do something about it. He had also suffered through more horrors that anyone should ever have to, so he needed to escape. He couldn’t physically escape from the web though; what he could do was put his mind into a state of nothingness that would spare him the torture of remaining conscious in the Trap.
He expected to be less than asleep when he had so disconnected himself from his surroundings, but that clearly wasn’t the case because he could think about the fact that he was still thinking. He dared to open his eyes and found he was nowhere near the forest he had been in; instead he was lying in a comfortable bed looking up at a high white ceiling, and there was someone there with him.
When he turned to look his heart stopped. It was Rose, he was in bed with Rose. So he was dreaming, but at least it was a good dream, he’d escaped the nightmares of the Dementor Trap at least.
But as he reached out to stroke her face it occurred to him that this was a nightmare, in its way. Dreaming of the thing he could never have and wanted so desperately; it made his heart ache. But at least these dreams were familiar territory and he knew he could handle the agony it put him through.
Rose’s eyes fluttered open at his touch and she smiled at him. “Morning,” she muttered, then leaned forward and lazily kissed him. Her mouth tasted of morning breath but he didn’t care, he looped an arm around her pulling her closer, and deepened the kiss. “Love you,” he muttered between kisses, the words he had never given her in the waking world. Even here his heart pounded as he said them.
And then it hit him.
His heart. His single, frantic, painfully human heart. He’d gone so far out of himself that he’d ended up in his double. His double who woke up every morning next to Rose and it wasn’t a dream. The life he’d walked away from; the life he’d chosen to reject.
He pulled away from her so he could stare at her face, taking in everything about her, including her complete confusion at the moment. “Rose,” he whispered desperately, which only seemed to make her more confused.
“Doctor, what’s wrong?” she asked.
This might be worse than staying in the Dementor Trap. There’d he’d face the memories of all the things he’d done in his lifetimes, but he dealt with those memories often; here he had this, this taste of what he could have had, knowing it belonged to his half human doppelganger.
But if he was only borrowing the moment, he could at least take advantage of it. “Rose, it’s me,” he said softly, and a little desperately he was sure.
She stared at him for another long moment, but she seemed to understand quickly enough. “Doctor?” she whispered, the catch in her voice so familiar. “Then how?”
“I’m not sure.”
“If you’re here, where’s my Doctor?”
That was like a knife to his single heart, and though obviously he had earned it, he still flinched at the reproach he heard in her voice. “Rose, I’m sorry. About everything.”
She managed to hold on to her anger for another moment but then she sighed. “I know. He explained everything. That it wasn’t because you didn’t love me and didn’t want me with you, but that still doesn’t give you the right to make decisions for me.”
He reached out to touch her, he’d never get enough of that in whatever time he had here. She didn’t pull away, though she didn’t lean into his touch as he would have liked. “It’s for the best,” was all he could say. It was all he’d ever been able to say.
“It worked out,” she corrected him.
Before he could say anything else he was pulled backwards. Through the nothingness of oblivion, past the eternity of painful memories brought into sharp clarity by the Dementor Trap, and into his new surroundings as he awoke in a new prison. But at least this one was made of stone and bars rather than his own guilty hearts.
2) I encourage people to go and vote in the various las challenges, I have a vested interest in hoping you vote for me in the
fanvideo_las voting that's currently going on.3) And now to catch up on posting recent LAS ics I wrote.
Name: jedi_of_urth
Shows: Frasier
Story Title: Thinking About You
Character/Relationships: Niles Crane Niles/Daphne
Rating: PG
Warnings: none
“When I was with Maris, or with Mel, I found myself thinking about you. Going about my day or even when I was in a session, I found myself thinking about you. Well, now we're together. I find myself thinking about you. It's not going to stop.” ~Niles Crane, ‘The First Temptation of Daphne
He couldn’t help it if his mind wandered during the day. Waiting in the Café for Frasier or as he finished up his notes from a session he could afford to let him mind drift and for years now his errant thoughts had always lead him back to Daphne.
At first it had been a guilty fantasy, something he could only indulge in in the parts of his mind that Maris wouldn’t weasel in to. Even his thoughts of Daphne had to be kept away from thoughts of Maris because the two things simply could not coexist. When Daphne was in the room Maris did not exist, and when Daphne was on his mind Maris was nowhere to be found.
Then it had become a refuge from the pressures of the real world. As the life he had built crumbled around him he would retreat into dreams of what he could barely hope would one day be. She’d made it clear many times that a man even tethered to a marriage was not a man she was interested in; though she only spoke in the hypothetical, not to whether between the two of them specifically it might have worked. But he had enough fodder for an active fantasy of what it might be like to be with her, to dream of what might be.
Later it was more of a nightmare than a dream. The pain of reality encroached on his day- dreams as she prepared to marry someone else. Even as he involved himself with Mel, his heart still thought only of Daphne. He tried not to think of her as he had for so long, tried to frame it in only the context of friendship, wondering how her day was going or what interesting things she might have to say the next time he was at Frasier’s. He tried not to wonder if she was feeling nervous about the wedding or still had doubts.
Now his wandering thoughts bring a smile to his face. As always his dreams find her, but now he thinks about whether they need bird food or what they should serve the next time dad and Frasier come over for dinner. The wondrous concerns of everyday life that he enjoyed by the side of the woman he loved with all his heart.
And if sometimes his thoughts drift to more intimate topics and he can’t suppress the giddy smile that spreads across his face he wears in proudly. After all, he’s living proof that dreams can become reality.
Name: jedi_of_urth
Shows: Legend of the Seeker
Story Title: Love Across Time
Character/Relationships: Richard, Cara, Richard/Kahlan
Rating: PG
Warnings: Spoilers from the end of season 1
“Have you thought of any plan for what we do if this doesn’t work?” Cara asked as they climbed up another rocky hill on their way back to where Richard had stored the Boxes of Ordin.
Even Richard’s usual good humor didn’t let him be happy that Cara had started to refer to the pair of them as we, at least for the duration of this trip. He knew, and he knew Cara knew, that there was no back up to this plan. If it didn’t work he’d either be dead or Confessed and either way he wasn’t going to be carrying out any more plots against the Master, Nicholas Rahl.
He’d fight a dozen Darken Rahls if it meant this future never existed. A timeline in which Kahlan was dead, but only after she had already sacrificed everything in the hope that Richard could make things right. He’d be damned if he let her down after that.
That thought kept him going on days when by all logic he should give up. He would not let Kahlan down; he would never let Kahlan down.
“It’ll work out,” he assured Cara in a voice ragged from hunger and exhaustion. Cara would think he was being excessively optimistic, but she didn’t hear him mutter to himself, “It has to.”
Name: jedi_of_urth
Story Title: Borrow the Moment
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: JE spoilers, plus hints of the Doctor’s state of mind during the specials.
The Dementor Trap was among the foulest things anyone had every thought of that didn’t kill someone. Although, in truth, anyone left too long in the Trap would expire eventually; and if a person had seen or done too many things they regretted, the horror of those memories coming back to them at full force could kill quickly.
The Doctor’s mind was made of sterner stuff that most people in the universe, so when he wandered into the Trap he sensed what had happened and had a split second to do something about it. He had also suffered through more horrors that anyone should ever have to, so he needed to escape. He couldn’t physically escape from the web though; what he could do was put his mind into a state of nothingness that would spare him the torture of remaining conscious in the Trap.
He expected to be less than asleep when he had so disconnected himself from his surroundings, but that clearly wasn’t the case because he could think about the fact that he was still thinking. He dared to open his eyes and found he was nowhere near the forest he had been in; instead he was lying in a comfortable bed looking up at a high white ceiling, and there was someone there with him.
When he turned to look his heart stopped. It was Rose, he was in bed with Rose. So he was dreaming, but at least it was a good dream, he’d escaped the nightmares of the Dementor Trap at least.
But as he reached out to stroke her face it occurred to him that this was a nightmare, in its way. Dreaming of the thing he could never have and wanted so desperately; it made his heart ache. But at least these dreams were familiar territory and he knew he could handle the agony it put him through.
Rose’s eyes fluttered open at his touch and she smiled at him. “Morning,” she muttered, then leaned forward and lazily kissed him. Her mouth tasted of morning breath but he didn’t care, he looped an arm around her pulling her closer, and deepened the kiss. “Love you,” he muttered between kisses, the words he had never given her in the waking world. Even here his heart pounded as he said them.
And then it hit him.
His heart. His single, frantic, painfully human heart. He’d gone so far out of himself that he’d ended up in his double. His double who woke up every morning next to Rose and it wasn’t a dream. The life he’d walked away from; the life he’d chosen to reject.
He pulled away from her so he could stare at her face, taking in everything about her, including her complete confusion at the moment. “Rose,” he whispered desperately, which only seemed to make her more confused.
“Doctor, what’s wrong?” she asked.
This might be worse than staying in the Dementor Trap. There’d he’d face the memories of all the things he’d done in his lifetimes, but he dealt with those memories often; here he had this, this taste of what he could have had, knowing it belonged to his half human doppelganger.
But if he was only borrowing the moment, he could at least take advantage of it. “Rose, it’s me,” he said softly, and a little desperately he was sure.
She stared at him for another long moment, but she seemed to understand quickly enough. “Doctor?” she whispered, the catch in her voice so familiar. “Then how?”
“I’m not sure.”
“If you’re here, where’s my Doctor?”
That was like a knife to his single heart, and though obviously he had earned it, he still flinched at the reproach he heard in her voice. “Rose, I’m sorry. About everything.”
She managed to hold on to her anger for another moment but then she sighed. “I know. He explained everything. That it wasn’t because you didn’t love me and didn’t want me with you, but that still doesn’t give you the right to make decisions for me.”
He reached out to touch her, he’d never get enough of that in whatever time he had here. She didn’t pull away, though she didn’t lean into his touch as he would have liked. “It’s for the best,” was all he could say. It was all he’d ever been able to say.
“It worked out,” she corrected him.
Before he could say anything else he was pulled backwards. Through the nothingness of oblivion, past the eternity of painful memories brought into sharp clarity by the Dementor Trap, and into his new surroundings as he awoke in a new prison. But at least this one was made of stone and bars rather than his own guilty hearts.
