Crack filled crack

[jedi_of_urth]

Blame goldy_dollar it's all her fault. That this is probably full of errors is my own but we're going to pretend it's the Master's own fault. Anyway, seeing as the Master totally ships Doctor/Rose (and really just loves Rose), here's to thinking he also writes fanfic. I'm sorry, so very sorry.



The Master’s Secret Fiction Concepts
(No Lucy I will not call it fanfic)


-Lucy and I have dinner with the Doctor and Rose
Pros: Not out of character for the Doctor to ask me out on a date, chance to show that I am always smarter than him. Could take place in *my* TARDIS so I could rub that in his face too.
Cons: I believe it is not in character for Rose to call me Master, but that is my name.

-Lucy and Rose shove Martha Jones off a cliff
Pros: Shoving Martha off a cliff, probably many cliffs wherever she is. Possible girl on girl action after shoving is complete. Idea of Lucy shoving someone off cliff is hot (should use in real life).
Cons: By rights, Lucy should also shove Rose off a cliff as she is more dangerous than Martha, this would negate desired girl on girl action in this story. Also would have to justify Rose’s presence.

-Journal of Doctor’s emo since loss of Rose
Pros: Chance to mock Doctor for nearly crying whenever I ask about Rose for characterization purposes.
Cons: He’d probably accuse me of finding his actual diary of emo since loss of Rose. Would have to find good thesaurus entry for “sad.”

-Alternate reality story where I met Rose first
Pros: Wish Rose had been my companion (Lucy is great, but she couldn’t absorb the Time Vortex). Alternate reality Doctor would never have known her and would be even more pathetic now. Words “alternate reality’ and “Rose” when used together annoy Doctor.
Cons: Could make me envious of my own alternate reality.

-After destroying this world, cross to other universe and make Rose like Lucy for that universe
Pros: Easy to invent fictional reason why I could cross universes. Quite like fantasy of turning the Doctor’s love into my own, and I get second hot blond wife, and second universe to control. Would include scene where the Doctor dies of broken heart (could even force him to watch us have sex in story).
Cons: Again, am somewhat envious of my own invented future. Also, Doctor dying of broken heart is most in character but would prevent him from seeing rest of what happens in the story.

-Doctor/Rose reunion story
Pros: Good for taunting Doctor with as will never happen. Probable cuteness of story good for days when just ruling the world; having hot wife; having Doctor as pet, Jack to torture/kill, and Jones family to torment is not enough to make me smile.
Cons: Am somehow sad that it will never happen even if probable cute levels should be called sickening. Might give Doctor ideas about crossing universes.

-Doctor/Rose/Jack sex story
Pros: Have promised to Jack in exchange for his help on editing and characterization. He says the group of them never did have sex, but I know he wanted to, so can also bother him with ideas that never happened.
Cons: Breaking promises to Jack is also fun (and he was not complimentary of my me/Rose stories). Would feel urge to de-age Doctor and retrieve Rose in order to confirm hotness of sex scene.

Comments

[principia.livejournal.com]

Eh-he-he-he-he!

[marble-rose.livejournal.com]

Heh. This is good stuff. I think Rose would absolutely fascinate the Master.

I really like this part: Pros: Wish Rose had been my companion (Lucy is great, but she couldn’t absorb the Time Vortex). Alternate reality Doctor would never have known her and would be even more pathetic now. Words “alternate reality’ and “Rose” when used together annoy Doctor.

[jedi_of_urth]

I kind of forgot to handle replies to this in the wake of DH I think, but now I'm getting back to it. I agree, Rose would totally fascinate the Master.

This is just crack but I'm glad you liked it and thanks for commenting.

[lilyofshalott]

HEE! Oh, that's brilliant. ^_^

[goldy-dollar.livejournal.com]

OMG! I AM SO GLAD YOU DID THIS. <33333333333

This has too much genius for me to handle.

Cons: He’d probably accuse me of finding his actual diary of emo since loss of Rose. Would have to find good thesaurus entry for “sad.”

*sporfle*

You REALLY have to post this on oh_she_knows. *adds to mems*

[jedi_of_urth]

You REALLY have to post this on oh_she_knows.

Long overdue, but I finally did.

Also, long overdue, glad you liked this since you made me start thinking about it. One day one of us should do Martha's Diary of Doctor/Martha fanfic that we talked about.

[intrikate88.livejournal.com]

ASFDLKJA;FJLSADJG. Forget DH, this is by far the best literary contribution to the world today. I shrieked, not once but several times, and am waiting for other members of household to comment.

Good God. Every word of that was brilliant.

AND I CAN SO SEE IT HAPPENING.

[jedi_of_urth]

Thanks to DH I put off handling replies to this, and for some reason kept putting it off, but I can finally say think you for reading and commenting on my little venture into crack filled not quite fic which I'm happy you liked so much.

Good to be called brilliant some times.

[intrikate88.livejournal.com]

I did like it so much. And you should be called brilliant all the time, clearly. I even thought of this fic when I wrote a Master/Lucy fic and decided to put a scene with them talking about writing Doctor/Rose fic in. You're an inspiration! XD

[jedi_of_urth]

Well, now I want to read your fic, got a link handy?

Follow the inspiration ball around and around, one thing leads to another and causes more good things to happen.

[intrikate88.livejournal.com]

http://intrikate88.livejournal.com/98565.html

It's intertextuality! I love intertextuality. It brings absolutely everything together and turns pirated inspiration into a community! Or something. I should develop that idea more if I'm going to write a thesis on it, probably!

[jedi_of_urth]

Aww, that's a cute story. And I left more detailed feedback over on it.

Like I said, my inspiration for this came from some thing goldy_dollar said in her recap of LotTL, to which my reply, among other things, included the idea of Jack beta reading for him (although the irony that I have the Master with a beta reader while I can't seem to work up the inclination to get one myself is maybe noteworthy).

[leighleighla.livejournal.com]

Oh god.

Can't stop laughing.

This was genius.

[jedi_of_urth]

That seems to be one of the preferred passages, though I'm a bit partial to cliff shoving myself. Thanks for leaving feedback especially when it calls something I do genius, it makes me feel good.

[jedi_of_urth]

I just get a kick out of thinking of the Doctor pouting over the violation of his angsty emo diary

Which the Doctor sometimes considered leaving lying around in the hopes that Martha would read it and get the message that he was an angsty emo Time Lord, but he never did so he had to put up with her crush. So then he would have thought the Master had found his super secret hiding place (under his pillow) and be upset.

[swankkat.livejournal.com]

*SNORT* Hmm, so that's what Orange Crush soda feels like when forced through one's nostrils....

Brilliant, you just know the Master would write some killer kinky fanfic.

[jedi_of_urth]

you just know the Master would write some killer kinky fanfic.

He would wouldn't he? Though the Master's kinks would probably disturb me greatly, it would sure be interesting.

*SNORT* Hmm, so that's what Orange Crush soda feels like when forced through one's nostrils....

Well, at least this has also been an educational experience for you. Glad it made you laugh; thanks for leaving feedback about soda through the nose.

[roxyk630.livejournal.com]

OH I was DYING with laughter the whole way through. Fantastic!

[jedi_of_urth]

Thanks, I was hoping to make people laugh with this, good to have feedback confirming that.

[svanderslice.livejournal.com]

absolutely inspired! Total love for this. *giggles uncontrolably*

[jedi_of_urth]

It's a good bit of fun isn't it? Glad you liked my clearly insane writing about writing fanfic.

[kalleah.livejournal.com]

Bwahahahaha.

I don't have anything deep to say, but that was funny as hell. Tee hee.

[laeti.livejournal.com]

This is brilliant!

[surrender-drthy.livejournal.com]

lol! that's brilliant :D very very amusing, and very Master-y.. at least from what I know of him.

[hippiebanana132.livejournal.com]

*chokes laughing* This is brilliant!

[sunnytyler001.livejournal.com]

I LOVE the Master and yes, he's a Rose fan/ Doctor & Rose shipper!!!